Question: Whatís the main reason why you write erotic stories?
For me it is truly the chance to let my imagination run free. (And believe me...I have one!) But it is also because I so enjoy getting and reading the comments and feedback from my readers. Quite often they may share an experience, or just let me know how much they enjoyed what they read, and why. I love knowing that, hearing that. (Especially the really naughty ones!)
Question: How did it all get started and what made you write your first story?
Though I've been writing short stories for a while, I didn't really write any real erotica until just about three-four years ago. How Thesandman began and why I began writing in the first place was due to a woman I met on-line in a chat room. I have since written a story about all of that called "I remain" which is basically how I got started writing in the first place. So I'll leave that up to the readers if they'd really like to know the full story behind all that.
Question: Do you write only fantasy or also true stories?
Much of what I write is a combination of both to some degree. Though for the most part, it is truly pure imagination, most of my stories have a sprinkling of truth in them based on past experiences. But I don't usually *kiss and tell* preferring to leave it up to the reader as to what may, or may not be truth. I think it allows the readers to enjoy the wonder of it as well in doing it that way. Though often I've been asked: "Is this a true story?" And usually my response is: "Maybe..."
Question: Which ones do you prefer to write?
Again, I prefer including a little bit of both, though in truth, usually the true experiences are far less exciting that the fantasy. Which I would dare say is true for most writers when it boils right down to it. When allowed to let the mind wander into areas that most might not normally go, except in or through fantasy, it makes it more enjoyable to read, and far more exciting to write.
Question: Do you also enjoy reading erotic stories?
I do, and try to read several whenever I can, but time limitations, (my own writing) and schedule doesn't give me as much free time as I would like.
Question: Which ones do you prefer to read, true or fantasy?
It honestly depends. If a true story doesn't read like something posted in a Penthouse Letters magazine, then I usually enjoy it. Something about that "truth" factor that makes you grin...makes you imagine. But usually when someone says "This is a true experience" then I read it...I sometimes have my doubts and it tends to take away from the story rather than enhance it.
Question: Which genre does please you the most?
Funny...but I write in just about every genre imaginable. Something I have done as a challenge to myself. Obviously not everything I write appeals to everyone. But thatís ok. Hopefully I have written a wide variety enough to appeal to the majority, and still leave a few for the minority who might not otherwise read my work. I don't pretend to be knowledgeable in all areas.
At times I have to do research, or ask friends and honestly interview in order to get a better feel for the story, or characters I write about. This is particularly true with the few lesbian stories I have written. I have some very good lesbian friends, and it has been through their help and insight that I have attempted to portray a different kind of story that I think a lot of male writers would write.
And, as many would also come to know and realize, most of my stories do have some kind of a message, or point that I like to include. Sometimes it's obvious, sometimes not. But my own personal trade-mark if you will, is either a surprise twist, or some kind of worthwhile message or ending.
Question: How long have you been writing now?
Iíve actually written stories most of my life. Though early on, they were of course the typical silly kind of stories most kids would write. I often made up my own comic books for friends when I was little. From there going on to actually write single page stories and such. So the desire has always been there to write.
But I honestly didn't have the skills back then to be the kind of writer I am hopefully moving towards even now. Being part Indian, my grandmother once told me when I was younger that I would one day grow up to tell stories around the campfire as I was always exaggerating everything when I was young. She called me "Story Teller" so in a way, I guess she was right.
I actually never considered myself a writer, but I did feel I could tell a pretty good story. It's the editors that make a Story Teller a writer to be perfectly honest. And it is to them that I find admiration for their talent and skills to be able to do that.
Question: Are all your stories posted on this site or do you have some secret stories you donít want to publish for the public?
Not all no. I have a few that I haven't posted for one reason or another. Mostly because they are stories I've written early on, that I go back to now and cringe as I read them. Perhaps one day I will find the time to punch them up as I hopefully have learned a bit more in improving my word usage. Others, are indeed personal. Many of which I have written privately for people who've asked me to do so as a special favour or request.
I have from time to time written stories for someone's anniversary, or for a special occasion or birthday. I charge a very nominal fee for doing that, but consider that particular story the person I wrote it for, and not open for publication anywhere after that. After all, they paid me to do it for them, so now it's 'their' story!
Question: How long does it take for you to write a complete story? How does the process go?
Generally on a 10-15 (word) page story, anywhere from two-three hours time. Oddly enough, it is usually a word or phrase, or a basic idea that gives me the idea for a story. What's fun for me (and which other writers I have talked to usually don't do) is just begin. The let the story unfold all by itself as I write. Quite often I have NO clue where it's going until much later.
Then like that little light-bulb going on over my head, I can see the ending, know where I want to go in order to get there, and then take off in that direction. I would dare say a majority of my stories have started out that way. Nothing more than a simple idea, then I allow the characters I create to evolve into whatever personality they're going to assume all on their own.
Perhaps that's a bit strange to do it that way, but it's kind of fun meeting all the different characters inside my head as they introduce themselves to me. I just take it from there and have fun with it wherever it eventually goes.
Question: What is the hardest part of writing a story?
Probably reaching a point where I am a) not repeating myself. Or b) making the story too long so that many might not desire to finish it. If the idea is a good one (for me anyway) then I usually break it up into a series of chapters. So that seems to do far better.
My story "The Ya Ya Dildohood" was an entire story first written. But I went back and broke it up into bite-sized chapters. The Prequel to that, "Maggie" I left as a novelette as I think the continuity and flow of that particular story was better left as it was.
Question: How do you come up with your story titles?
Most of the time I don't even have a title for the story until I am half-way through, or nearly finished when a line or a thought hits me. Then wham...I have the title. Other times, I have the title in my head before I even begin to write, and then write the entire story around a single thought or idea as suggested by the title itself. So just depends on what strikes me at the time I am ready to write something.
Question: The characters in your story are the based on true people if itís a fantasy story?
Sometimes yes, mostly no however. Again, "Maggie" was actually based on a true character. An incredible woman with an open-mindedness well before her time. Other times, the characters I write about might be based on people I've met or known along the way. But generally, each and every one of them is something I've created and store away for later use. The personalities, mannerisms...all of that come from my own little mood or creation at the time. Especially based on the theme or tempo of the story I'm doing.
Question: Do you have a favourite author on ES and if so, why?
LOL...actually you could list the top twenty and you'd just about hit them all, with several others too numerous to mention, so I won't. But there are a
Question: Do you also publish your stories on other sites and if so, why?
I do yes. I think it has helped to reach a greater number of readers who might not otherwise discover Thesandman. Again, I love getting feedback, I love discussing what was liked or even not liked about something I've written. So doing that opens that possibility up to a wider range of people who might not otherwise read anything I've done.
Question: Have you ever published a story on paper?
Right now I have a book that is actually pending publication. It should be out very soon (sometime this summer in fact). This is a "fantasy" type book, the good old Dragon's and Elves, and Dwarves and Orc's kind of a read. But with perhaps one major difference than a lot of fantasy type stories I've read. Mine has a lot of sex in it! (lol). I mean think about it...where the hell do all those Elves, Orcís, Goblins and the like come from anyway?
Someone once compared me (not that they should) when I had "Dragon's Breath" posted temporarily on another site just to see how well it would do if published, to George R.R. Martin. He's one of the few fantasy writers out there that has incorporated some pretty explicit sex into his fantasy novels. I admired that, and for me, added a bit more realism to the adventure. As again, the thought of Elves actually having sex with humans or one another can be pretty interesting to read and think about.
Question: What do you like the most and the least about writing erotic stories?
The most, is that each and everyone of us has a personal fantasy we might enjoy reading about. Not every fantasy comes true, some should, some shouldn't. But the beauty of writing about it is, for a moment, each and everyone of us gets to experience and enjoy that fantasy. That thought.
We live it in the words of the writer, so in a sense, our fantasies are fulfilled even if we never really experience them in real life. What I like the least about writing erotic stories is, sometimes I get so excited writing them, I have to stop and take a few moments for self pleasures as well. The problem I have with that, is then waiting the time needed and necessary to get the old creative juices flowing again (so to speak) so that I can finally finish my own story!
Question: What genre donít you like at all? And what kind would you never write?
As I mentioned, I've attempted most, even if I don't have first had knowledge or personal experience. There are some of course I would never touch nor do. True brutality for one, I could never do, though I might hint at, or lead the reader to assume that's what I'm going to write about, then take it in an entirely different direction, which is what I did on one of myß 'alphabet series stories' B is for Bastard. I was amazed at the number of comments I got from several readers who were actually disappointed that the main character wasn't actually molested or injured in the story!
Question: Have you ever done research for a part of a story you didnít have any knowledge about?
Oh yeah, all the time. Like I said the few lesbian stories I've written I've had to do that, and grateful that I have some open-minded lesbian friends who were more than willing to share their insight and thoughts with me. Interestingly, I then try as hard as I can, to place myself in that particular POV, actually attempting to see it from a woman's side, think through it as a woman might (and yes...it can be done as I've then had friends read what I've done to see if the POV comes across that way.
As a matter of fact, as a challenge to myself (and no I won't tell what name I wrote under) I also wrote several stories as a woman. I did so more out of curiosity to see if they did better as though coming from a woman as opposed to a man. Interestingly enough...I did three stories very similar in nature, side by side comparisons, and in two of the three, the woman written stories seemed to fair far better. So just a little interesting side note on that one.
Not sure it has enough data to really prove anything, but I certainly found it interesting and got quick a kick out of it (as well as the number of obscene proposals to meet!)
Question: Have you learned anything you would like to share since you started writing erotic stories?
Probably the biggest thing is to go back and re-read smaller portions for continuity and general typo's before going further. It's helped me to cut down on the idiotic mistakes that most of us don't catch, even through a second full run-through. So for me, that's one of the biggest things I've done to clean up my writing.
Question: Does it give you a good feeling to be a popular author on this site? Do you have any other feelings about it perhaps?
LOL. Most popular? Not hardly. Sure, I appreciate each and every email or comment I receive. In fact, I look forward to them more than I'm willing to admit. Not just for the ego stroke either. But because it brings me a great deal of joy and pleasure to know I've written something that turned someone on, made someone think, or brightened a person's day.
Not just getting them off, (though that's always fun to hear about too!). I'm just glad that if I am popular enough to be read, then it means my efforts are worthwhile, and it keeps me wanting to write, wanting to entertain, and hopefully...even more importantly, continue to improve.
Question: Which of your stories is your personal favourite, or one you enjoyed writing the most, or which one holds the best memories or feelings for you?
My favourite to be honest was a story that is still actually hard for me to even read to this day. Now mind you, I'm 50+ years of age, though I am proud to say, I don't think I look it, nor certainly act like some 50 year old men I know. But anyway, I had a long term relationship with a woman half my age, and she was at the time a 'labelled' lesbian if you will.
In time, we grew close, eventually became intimate, and during the course of that, taught one another an awful lot on either side of that coin. I became a lot more understanding on the one hand, and she learned that not all men are as bad as (hate saying this) a lot of lesbians seem to think we are. So ok, maybe a lot of men are for one reason or another, and not just on the basis of personal preference. I believe there's a lot more bisexual men and women out there that either are willing to admit to.
But I digress here (lol). I wrote "Smile and Remember" about us, about our relationship. It was one of the few stories I've written based totally on truth, and perhaps the hardest story I've ever attempted to write with the exception of one or two others. It was the emotion and sensitivity as to what we learned and experienced with one another that was hard for me to put into words and have it come across with the same emotional feelings we both felt.
And though the ending of course wasn't real (hopefully not yet anyway) the story itself expressed our mutual feelings which we still have and hold towards one another to this very day.
Question: When you receive comments, obviously you would enjoy the positive ones, but if you receive negative ones, do you just ignore them, build from them, or let it put a negative image over the story itself, and let it hinder your writing?
Oh heavens no. I have always appreciated the true honest constructive criticism in my writing. I have learned from that, and hopefully improved my writing because of it. I'm still no expert, and I still don't consider myself a true writer. A story teller yes. And hopefully a good one. But the true writers of the word, I admire and respect a great deal.
There are of course the occasional people who might slam a story for one reason or another, but based on what they have to say, those are usually just a matter of a person's taste, likes and dislikes. It's funny...some think Thesandman should always write in a particular way. I prefer to challenge myself, writing something a little different in order to keep myself from getting stale or that "same old, same old" kind of story line.
Question: If there was one trait you could take out of one of your stories, and put it in place in your real life, what would it be and why?
LOL...a little bit of me is in each and every one of my stories. I include humour when appropriate, lesson's learned (by that meaning things I had to experience, some good...some bad) in order to have a better understanding of the story being told, and shared. So if anything, the reverse is true. I write as my life has often been, both up as well as down.
Question: What is the impact of having fans had on your writing and your everyday life?
Just keeps me wanting to continue. Without the fans, there would be no real incentive to do so.
Question: Are you anything like your characters you write in real life?
lol, oh yeah. I think my imagination, my open-minded ness about life in general, as well as my constant curiosity to explore and push the envelope is the real me. And that is to me that many of my characters are created with.
Question: Is your real sex life as exciting as your stories?
Don't we wish. At times it has been yes. Not a constant. Like anything, there are ups and downs, good and bad. Way exciting, to hardly anything at all. But that is after all...life.
Question: We already know you enjoy erotic stories, but do you also enjoy the visual side of erotica, as in porn movies? If so, any favourites?
I do watch erotica quite often. But it really depends on the particular mood I am in. Sometimes the threesome/foursome thing...then just good old one on one sex. But am very oral, (not just the getting) but love seeing a woman truly pleasured in that way. What's funny is this...to really see and enjoy that, you almost have to watch lesbian type porn to do that.
There is very little that I have seen at least, where a guy spend what I feel should be a considerable amount of time pleasuring a woman that way. Most pornís obviously are meant to excite, get you there...and then wham/bam pop your cookies. But, as I said...love watching oral stimulation on both sides. And oh yeah...there's not enough breast stimulation in most movies either. Something else I not only enjoy seeing, but doing.
Question: Is there anybody on this site, who you would like to see interviewed? And why?
For someone who has awesome wit, a sweet natured and interesting individual to communicate and chat with, I would highly recommend Maggie2002. She's a lot of fun to talk and discuss stories with. I've enjoyed my association and friendship with her enormously.
Though another is Colleen Thomas, a very talented writer whom I have known for a while now, even though we're not exactly blossom buddies. But I have admired and appreciated her work as well.
Question: Whatís the kinkiest thing you have done in your life so far?
I can't believe I'm actually going to admit this. But it had to be convincing an old girlfriend of mine to be the centrepiece at an erotic little party I had for a friendís birthday. Everyone ate off her (which was interesting enough as it was) then capping off the evening by the two of us having sex in front of everyone else. Not sure that's real kinky. But it was damn exciting!
Question: Do you have any fantasies that you would like to fulfil?
Not many really. I've been DAMN lucky to have actually had the opportunity to experience most. Not many I think can actually say that. But of those that I still think about from time to time, or would certainly enjoy doing or trying, it would have to be an everyone's blind-folded group-grope. So you don't know who the hell it is your with, nor care. You just go for it...have fun, and experience the intensity of not knowing who the other person is. (Yeah...male or female) Kind of makes it interesting no?
Question: Have you ever done erotic photography? If not, would you like to be photographed or not?
Oh hell yes. I don't mind admitting I'm a bit of an exhibitionist to be perfectly honest. I'm always willing to exchange photo's with someone if they're interested. Doesn't bother me. I have an appreciation for the human body...and I'm not talking the "a-typical" Playboy centrefold. I like real people...every day normal looking people with the human flaws and imperfections that give them character, and make them more real and personal to me.
Question: Is there anything else you would like to say to the readers of this interview? Now is your chance...
Basically that I'm simply grateful to have the venue in which to write and express myself. That others read, and often enjoy is simply a bonus. Through this, I have enjoyed friendships and relationships with others I might not have ever had. I've explored, discovered things about myself, and shared thoughts and fantasies with others I might not ever have considered before. So...it's also been a great way to come up with new ideas for my stories.
Question: Do you notice any differences between the "younger" writers on here, and between the "older writers" of this site?
LOL....just one. Seems like the older writers put more passion and emotion into their writing. Maybe thats from experience. Younger writers tend to leave out a lot of (I think) needed detail.
Well, I hope you enjoyed this interview and comments are welcome. So if you have any requests for our next victim, just ES mail it to me. And the one with the most requests might be our new victim. That is of course if plenty of people comment and read this interview. So the more feedback, the bigger the chance that there will be another interview! If you have any questions you would like me to ask our next victim, let me know and I will fire them at him or her. You may also let me know which questions you would like to see asked to the victim.
Also let Thesandman know what you liked of his answers to my questions, and donít forget to check out his stories!
With kind regards,
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