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Beginnings are always tumultuous times. Everything that is going to happen depends on what you do, or, more often the case when I was younger, in what you don't do. This is a tale of might have been. Or, if you'd rather, think of it as a fanciful way of remembering the events leading up to my awakening.

I started my sexual experiences much as any other boy, in high school. Ah, how dearly we all remember those fumbling encounters in the back seats of cars. Filled with the heights of ecstasy and the depths of embarrassment because you didn't quite know what really went where.

I never really understood just how easy it was to please a woman, until I met Jenny. I was in the Army, stationed in the armpit of America. I had recently discovered this wonderful thing called the Internet, especially AOL and chatting with other, real live people!

I was trolling through the various channels, when I stopped in one, which was a populous city close to the base I was at. I started looking at profiles, just bored and seeing if anything caught my fancy; when I noticed one that said "Poohbear23". Now before you could even say "Christopher Robbins", I was opening up that profile to see what interesting facts I could dig up. Well the person in question was young, female, lived only about 30 minutes away from me, liked the same kind of stupid comedy I did...and was married, DAMN. Well I made some lame comment in the room about her quote, and lo and behold, she ...

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