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After our surreal meeting with my principal, a meeting where my mother had turned once again into a terrifying harpy, I longed for peace and tranquility. I would have been quite happy to drive home in silence, but no, of course not. Mom couldn't leave well enough alone.

"That girl, Bridget, she's very pretty."

"Yes."

"Really, she's about the most beautiful girl I've ever seen."

"Uh-huh."

There was a bit of a pause, I stopped at a red light, and when the light turned green Mom said, "I can get her for you. I mean, I can arrange it so that she becomes your girlfriend. Totally devoted, obedient..."

"No! Don't even think about it! Leave her alone. And," I tried to make my voice as commanding as commanding as possible, "I want you to leave Julia alone. Whatever you're doing to her, stop it!"

That was a mistake. Mom grabbed the steering wheel, yanked hard right, and pulled us off the road. I jammed on the brakes and as we slid to a stop I screamed, "What the fuck are you..."

...

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