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"Oh God, what am I going to do? What am I going to do?" I repeated to myself as I waited with Tony and Ray for my boyfriend and Stefan to approach.

In about ten seconds flat he'd be right in front of me and would be able to see the come stains all over my face and hair and clothes. How the hell could I explain that? I looked desperately around the alley for something to wipe it off, but there was nothing there. I could use my hands but I'd never be able to get it out properly.

Suddenly Tony turned towards me and pulled a can of beer from his pocket. He rapidly shook it in his hand and then pointed it towards me and opened the ring pull. Immediately I was showered in beer. He aimed high and the frothy liquid covered my hair, splashing my face and chest, leaving me completely drenched. I could have kissed him. I quickly brushed my hair and face with my hands, wiping away the thick globs of come, as I pretended to be trying to dry myself off.

"What the hell are you doing, Tony?" Joey shouted when he reached us finally.

"Uh, well, I was just having a laugh, you know?"

"Shit. I know you don't get on too well, but she's my fucking girlfriend. Are you okay, Tina?" ...

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