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DC&H by KK

I sat up straight in bed and looked at the clock on the bedside table. It was 2:30 AM. The tee shirt I wore to bed was soaking wet, as it always was when I had the dream. I looked over at my wife and she was sound asleep. I was relieved that I hadn't awakened her. This time I must not have been ranting in my sleep.

I didn't know what triggered the dream but it was always the same. It was a dream clouded version of the memories of an event that took place more than two years ago. In the dream I was sitting at the desk in my study. Sitting on the desk in front of me was a half full bottle of scotch, an empty glass and a 38 revolver. I would pour myself a full glass of the scotch and drink it down in one large gulp. It would always register in my dream that I neither tasted nor felt the effects of the scotch as it went down. I would then pick up the gun and open the cylinder to make sure all six chambers contained a live cartridge.

Then I would say "It's fucking full, none missing. I want to fucking kill them. I want to kill all three of those fuckers. If I do it I will go to jail. No, I'll fucking kill myself. God damn them..."

The words were not always the same but the idea was. Thank God the dreams had become much less frequent. At first I had one every week and sometimes twice a week but now it was less than once in two months. ...

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