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Daphne By Just Plain Bob

My wife was having an Avon party so I stopped for a few beers after work with some of the guys. I wasn't paying much attention to the other people in the bar, at least not until I heard a very familiar laugh. I hadn't heard it in years, but the laugh was so distinctive that I knew who it had to be. I got up from my table and went looking. He was at a table at the back of the bar with two women and another man and even though I might be intruding I walked toward his table. When I got close enough I said, "Excuse me, but the bartender told me I could find the only man in the world uglier than me back here at this table."

He looked up at me and the recognition was instant. He leaped up from the table and said, "Thems fightin words asshole" and he rushed at me. I saw alarm on the faces of the others at the table, but it turned to confusion as I braced myself for what I knew was coming and opened my arms. He rushed up to me and stopped and we grabbed each other in a bear hug. "Billy! You old son of a bitch. Where did you come from?"

I pointed to the front of the bar, "From a table back there."

"No, no, I mean what are you doing here?"

"I live here, have for the last ten years now."

...

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