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Things have changed since I wrote about him last. We have been seeing each other since August of last year. My happiness over finding a steady lover that was warm and caring has ment the world to me. The fact that we are best friends made it all more intense. I appreciated all that came to know about him.

For whatever reason, justified or not he has seemed to turn cold. All the little things that I loved, the phone calls just because , the short, cute text messages, most of that has stopped now. At times I even wonder what happened to my best friend because he seems to be a different man today.

I guess I expected this to work. I really wanted the best of both worlds and the simple truth is I tend to believe that I can make all things work. Maybe that is a weakness as well as a strength. Whatever the case may be, I'm missing what I know is lost.

We were really having a lot of fun. Sneaking off, stealing time, having drinks and laughs. We talked about everything and then would just fuck with total abandon. He would call me and say " did I tell you how much I love you today?". To me that was it. I had what I needed, someone on my side and I loved his kisses. Always full of passion, love and lust.

I guess in knowing so much happiness I was bound to feel some sorrow. I ...

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