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When I graduated from college with a degree in Theatre, I had visions of Broadway and Hollywood dancing in my head. Surely I would take the world by storm! Surely I'd be one of the lucky ones to find a break making Art and Theatre and Cinema! Sure!

Four years later at the age of 24, I found myself living in a small apartment in Los Angeles. I'd booked a couple of jobs here and there—the occasional commercial (one for Valtrex. . .boy, was my mom proud), small parts in small films—but, for the most part I supported myself through tutoring. Early on in my illustrious non-career, I'd discovered an important secret: well-monied people will spend untold thousands of dollars for someone to, essentially, sit with their offspring and do homework.

Lucrative? Sure. Fun? Most often not.

See, most of the kids I tutored were in high-school, junior or senior year. They'd never had to think for themselves, mostly got mediocre grades. Until the college admissions process began, this was fine. But now, faced with the prospect of having to compete with other kids for spots at top schools, they (or rather their parents) had to kick it into high gear. So the parents brought me in to help get grades up.

With most kids—although, at 17 or 18, they weren't really all that much younger than me—a typical session would start with about 5 minutes of ...

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