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Chapter 1: Know Thyself

I can't redefine darkness. I always thought I could. From the time that I left the orphanage on a scholarship to the university to now, I've done everything I could to embody the blackness that I always thought I felt. My blond hair was dyed black and I got a piercing in my left brow and nose. Some people would say that I wanted attention but really, I just wanted to be left alone. I was a classic case of anti-social repression and I was cool with that.

Classes were mostly just a way to pass the time because I had no clue what I wanted to do with my life. Art was always the first thing on the priority list but how exactly do you make a living at that? Graphic design? Boring. Ad work? Eh... I don't know. It was really hard to find definition in the environment that was supposed to help define you. Perhaps I'd just be a starving artist and stick to working at the book store. It paid the rent. I guess I just wasn't ‘avant-garde'.

Work was pretty nice for the most part. Studying and reading were rarely interrupted with anything more pressing than taking cash. The best part was that the boss didn't really mind if I wasn't chatty with the customers. Polite and professional was the order of the day. Besides, it helped keep my friend count to zero and no one seemed to remember my name. I defined anonymity. ...

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