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Some 20 minutes earlier, and what with it being a mid morning Saturday, I'd got suitably dressed to seduce my husband. Then his two best mates turned up, and they've been chatting away about sport, leaving me, somewhat neglected. Rather than get in a tizz over it, I decide to tidy up the breakfast things. Then Just as I finished the phone rings, and since Roy, my husband, is embroiled in conversation with Robin and Nigel, I go and answer it, saying: "don't anyone else move." Picking the receiver up, I say: "hello," then: "hey Julie, how are you?" In response to recognising her voice, followed by, "what's going on? Girlfriend." And over the next 30 seconds she tells me something quite worrying about my husband. After which, I calmly put the phone down and march over to confront Roy.

Placing my hands on my hips, and standing some 5ft away from him, sat on our large curved sofa, I ask: "where were you last Wednesday night?" "At a football game," he replies. "A football game," I exclaim, questioning his answer. Noticing my serious demeanour, Steve now gesticulates his hands saying: "do I need to be hearing this? Should I go?" And pointing with my right index finger I tell him: "no! You stay right there." Then moving it to Roy, I say: "you. Speak. Right now." "What can I say, I went to the bar and watched the game," he claims. Having placed my hand back on my hip, I say, more than ask: "and, did you go home with someone? Did you go home, to someone?" "No, I came right home, you know that, don't you remember?" He smugly rejoins.

...

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