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Working as an admin assistant for a very Conservative law firm for some two months, of a temporary six-month maternity leave contract, I felt quite safe, in that my employers had not discovered my somewhat, secret past. Then at 12 noon I got a call from one of the senior partners telling me to come to his office, and I concluded that they had somehow found out.

"Ah, Ms Haven," Nigel said, as I entered his office, where there was another well dressed man, sat to the left of his desk. "This is a Mr Rogers, who undertakes the odd investigation for the firm. Do sit down, please," he tells me. Having sat in the chair in front of Nigel's desk, I ask him ‘what he wants to see me about'. "I take it you're happy with my work?" I say, buoying myself up. "Your performance here is quite proficient, Ms Haven. However, it's your past comport that concerns me, especially working for a reputable Law firm such as this." ‘Yep, the games up,' I now realise, but decide to play it down. "I'm not sure what you mean. Everything on my CV is accurate," I sincerely tell him. "Yes, as Rex here has confirmed. However, Ms Haven, there is a slight omission," he says, giving me the option of coming clean.

"Apart from an individuals private life (indicating their sexual activity), I don't see what the problem is," I rejoinder, as I subconsciously run my right hand along the right collar of my part unbuttoned blouse. "There's private, private, and private public," Rex says. "To be quite blunt, Ms Haven," he continues, "you've appeared in ...

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