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I've been a high school principal for twenty years. I could sit here and tell you story after story about how I, as an educator, transformed one not so bright student into a genius, or about how I downgraded one tough guy after another. But that's not what you want to here, believe me. Nor is it the type of story I wish to relate to you. I can see that you want something different from me, something less ordinary. Well, sit back and grab a beer. The Principal has a few stories to tell and I just know you're going to enjoy this. What's that you say? You want to here about the most unique day of my career as a Principal? Hell, that's not so easy a request to grant, believe me. You see, I ran my schools in a special way. We didn't always have the state champion football team nor did my schools always rank first in academic achievement. Oh, sure, I had my successes, but every Principal does. No, you see, my schools always had a special type of staff, people who knew that I had certain, let's say, requirements. But, sure, I'll be glad to tell you a story or two about some special days. Let's see: where shall I begin? I know: how about my first day as a Principal? Now there's a tale. My first school was a high school with close to one thousand students. I walked into the office that first morning about two weeks before started. It was August, and hot as hell, as I recall. As I entered the office, my secretary, Mrs. Flannigan, gave me the biggest smile I'd ever seen. Now, here I was, thirty-five years old and Mrs. Flannigan was fifty-five years old. She was one of those women who had a beautiful face but had also gained a few pounds over the years. Her blonde hair disguised her age, but I had checked everyone's ...

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