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Friday 12 March: After the highs and lows of the last few months, I'd almost forgotten that Alex's uncontested divorce, for his sake, was due. And as I picked up the morning mail, I noticed the envelope with my solicitor's name franked on it and I knew what it meant without opening it.

Suddenly, I felt sick and rushed to the toilet. Bending over the bowl I croaked, coughed and spluttered, but nothing happened.

Looking at myself in the bathroom mirror, afterwards, I was a complete mess, and feeling the way I was, I phoned Ray at work and told him I wouldn't be in today.

"Okay, Jane, but make sure you're hear tomorrow, or else," he warned me. ‘Or else what, Ray?' I thought, further compounding my misery and put the phone down.

Oddly enough, Ray's attitude got to me in a somewhat positive way. First Alex, and then him, stick it to me, followed by that conniving bitch, Simone, and her accomplices. However, so long as there are young men like Gavin and the others, they will not get me down, no siree bob!

Going to where I kept my medicine, I found some stomach settling syrup and took a swig. Forgoing breakfast, I'll have brunch later, I got dressed and decided: if change is good enough for Alex, then - and ...

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