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The Glamourous Granny Competition ---------------------------------

1986 or possibly 1987, I was in my mid 20's and going out with Viv, a BBC TV producer who was both gorgeous, and incredibly .

During Whitsun week I found myself some hundred miles away from her, at a Holiday camp in South Wales, as bassist in a hastily put together backing band for a fading glam rocker who was appearing for a week's residency. I will call him Rocky for the sake of argument, but I do not refer to Handsome Beasts frontman Rocky Shades here, though we do know him.

Rocky's tastes in recreation would not pass the filters here, shall we say.

So there we were, at Butlins Barry Island. My mate Kevin was playing guitar in the band, and also filling in on vocals where Rocky's staple diet of whisky, cigarettes etc did not allow him to dare to tread.

We did all week with Rocky, two 45 minute spots per night, which allowed us a LOT of free time, but on the last day, the Friday, something blew in Rocky, and he was bleeding in his throat, and an ambulance took him away to Cardiff General hospital.

Kev and I took the vocals and the band did an impromptu set of rock and ...

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