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SME : Small/Medium Enterprise.

FOR DAVE, THE LOONY SCANDINAVIAN with the fabulous big erections that he shows us!

In the 1990's I was briefly at Derby University studying Business Studies. I only lasted six months there, but hey I did go back to Uni and I got that degree, twenty odd years later!

Not long after I started at University, I was sitting in the students union bar, knocking back pints of cider with a very good looking, but painfully shy lad called Marc, who was from my hometown and whom I knew from my sixth form college. Marc didn't have a girlfriend either back home or at uni. In fact, as far as I knew he had never had a girlfriend up to then, so I reasoned that he might still be a virgin. But...you know ...he might have had a one night stand or something. Who knows?

Anyway, he and I were vaguely talking about sex. I went on to speculate that a lot of the lads would be lonely away from home and they might consider a wank off or a blow job NOT to be really cheating on their girlfriends back home and they'd probably pay money for this service. This presented a business opportunity. He kind of agreed there would be a market for it but who would be willing to provide such a service? Well who indeed? Some sort of money orientated, hedonistic, amoral trollop was required.

Now, I was - for my age - quite experienced, I guess. I was 18, I'd fucked some ten to twelve lads/ men and god knows how many girls (boarding school!). I had also been spending far too much money on drinking, clubbing etc and takeaway food. I'd splurged outrageous amounts of cash and my family had absolutely refused to sub me any further. My overdraft at the bank was at situation critical!

Marc and I had two or three more ciders, then I got my folder out and put pen and paper on our table. I mused that I, personally, would be willing to wank a lad off for say £10, so I wrote that down on our tariff sheet.

As far as I recall this was the menu:

£10 wank (with me clothed)

£15 wank (with me topless)

Marc asked if that would include coming ON my tits. I said that it would if the client cleaned up after himself.

Note to self: get some baby wipes.

£20 for a tit-wank. From what a LOT of guys had said to me in the past, this was likely to be a big seller. (WORLD class tits)

Hmm ....I thought.... £30 for a blowjob? I asked Marc did he think that reasonable? He did. He did, if I swallowed. I told him I didn't swallow ANYWAY, and yes, I was generally a spitter back then, given the choice.

So, on to the actual SHAGGING: OO er! Would I ? COULD I ? Shag for money? I started to feel a little bit nervy about that element.

I decided that if I was to keep my clothes on and not get in a mess, then I could get several wanks done in quick succession - fast moving consumer goods as it were ! I'd make £50 in an evening, easy. A lot of money in those days (£120+ equivalent now)

BUT, HANG ON A THROW!

Was I actually going to do this?

Well... it did seem like quite a good idea, all told and wouldn't you know it my first customer DID seem to be already lined up!

So, a fuck: how MUCH for a FUCK ? £100 would be cool - from MY point of view - but I didn't imagine there would be many of the lads

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