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A BLOW JOB AT THE BEACH

By Peter Handler

It was a slow Friday at the office. With a long weekend ahead, most people took the afternoon off and tried to beat the traffic to their holiday destinations. The raucous clang of the bell on the time clock jarred me out of a perverted sexual fantasy.

I should have been pleased that another grueling week had come to an end. Ordinarily, I would have hurried home to play hide the salami with my beautiful wife. To say that we had not been getting along would be an understatement. Some trivial argument about nothing had escalated into World War III. It had been months since she had allowed me to hide my salami.

I couldn't remember the last time I had been so horny. After my coworkers left the building, I locked the door and sat at my desk masturbating. I was tensing up for what I knew would be a mind-numbing orgasm when something held me back. The little red fellow with horns perched on my shoulder whispered that I should wait. "You'll be getting some wicked fun tonight." I took his advice and stuffed my prick back in my pants.

I drove aimlessly. I had no desire to go home to endure the silent ...

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