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Not my favorite way to spend a Monday morning.

It was definitely not my favorite way to spend by Birthday, but here we were…at the doctor’s office. As if that wasn’t bad enough, this was the New Patient visit at a new office, thanks to a change in medical insurance. You know the routine: cramped into a too small chair with no elbow room, struggling to hold a clipboard in my left hand while using a golf pencil to fill out 3 pages of medical history questions about myself, my parents, their parents…. I digress.

I did my best to recall my past surgeries, even if I didn’t get the years exactly right. No smoking. Occasional alcohol consumption. More caffeinated soda than I wanted to admit, but at least it was diet. Yes to Type 2 diabetes, No to everything else. Family history of this and that. Finally, last page.

“Mr. Anderson ?!?” a voice called out. Shit…didn’t finish. I fumbled to gather my things together and stood.

“Hi, Mr. Anderson… I’m Mel.”

My eyes made their way from the jumble of stuff in my hands to a pair of grey cross trainers, and blue scrub pants. When I finally made eye contact, my brain just stopped. Mel, it turns out, was the real-life, strawberry blonde embodiment of Heloise Nerz. “Hello, Nurse….”, I ...

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